New Connections

On the July 30, I connected with a very distant cousin, through an ancestry program on line. After non-stop emailing for three weeks, it was agreed that we'd go to East Hampton earlier than we'd planned, and meet with them there. They drove from Maine. We drove from SC. We met on Aug 20, and shared a cottage in East Hampton with her and her husband for a full week.

While it is not my usual M.O. to be so 'brave' as to plan a trip and share a place for a week with someone I don't know. Somehow, I felt that it would all go well, at least with the two women. I had a little question about how the men would fare, but they both had been introduced through our emails, and seemed to look forward to the time we'd spend together. With so many similar interests, my wondering soon dissipated. When we met that afternoon, it was as if we were greeting old friends.

Aine is as tall and thin as I am short and round. We're an odd-looking couple! She's a full foot taller than I am, she's younger than I am, but her hair is prematurely white, while mine is still dark, with some threads of gray sprinkled thorough it. She is an educated and interesting person. She wakes with words on her lips and retires at night still much to say. Bruce is soft spoken, easily amused, well-read, intelligent and filled with good, common sense. He and Mike hit it off like long-lost brothers. They are quite similar in personality and interests, and I had no need to give a second thought to them being 'forced' to spending so much time together. There was no pretense in any of us, and our conversations were sincere and very animated. There was much laughter and sharing of lives.

We spent the week watching the sailboats on the Harbor, photographing sunsets and each other,
site-seeing, and cooking simple meals to eat. While the men opted for sitting in the yard, enjoying each other's company, Aine and I went out to cemetaries and libraries in search of ancestry records.

Sometimes life brings opportunities for adventure. While I would advise people to be cautious in making decisions regarding strangers, there are times when you just know. This was one of those times, and I'm glad I listened to my heart, and stepped away from all the 'what ifs'. It was a wonderful experience with a terrific couple, and we are already planning another time together.

It's All About Appearances

They say you can never go home again. Since I've moved from East Hampton nearly four years ago, I've been back twice. Even in such a short time, we noticed that there were many changes made in our absence. But one thing hasn't changed.
The absolute beauty of my birthplace.

There are many behind the scenes who work invisibly as individuals to keep the visible up to some very real standards. The Village and Town Zoning Boards meet and discuss issues relating to the integrity of the area in terms of buildings and signs, and many other things that I'm sure I would see if changes were allowed in their appearances. The LVIS, too, who work hard to keep things well in hand around the Village...the gardens, the flower boxes, all the 'pretties' that are enjoyed. The Village and the EH Town Hwy Departments work incessantly to keep up with the roads, the growth along the roadsides, the pruning of trees, the sweeping of streets while we sleep, the plowing of snows in season, the removal of leaves and brush, and so much more.

So many work so hard that visitors and residents alike might enjoy the famous and historic area that is now dubbed 'the Hamptons.' Tourists come and tourists go, and they return once again. Why? Some of the reason, I believe, is the beauty found at the end of Eastern Long Island. Nature has blessed the area with large shade trees, ponds, soft, sandy beaches, and clean bodies of water in which to play. History has played out on the turf, and some are drawn to that. Others come for the status ...to be able to say, "I own a place in the Hamptons", with little else on their minds. Natives stay, despite their rising annoyances with some of the tourist crowds, because it is their beloved hometown, and they don't want to leave. Other natives leave, due to their elevated annoyances, or because of the costs of staying in such a high priced area.

Regardless of whether one stays forever or comes and goes from East Hampton, I think we'd all agree on one thing....there's not another place in the universe that could hold a candle to the beauty of the town of East Hampton.

And The Story Continues...

Aine and I have been emailing all through each day and evening since we 'met' only a week ago across the wonders of the internet. Our ties to all things family are strong, and we relate on that topic so well. We understand each other, I guess.

As the words fly between us, similarities and preferences seep from our words, and we're discovering so many things. We like the same kinds of music. We'll eat nearly everything. We both write and have been in writing groups. We're both crafts persons and have a strong interest in photography. We're both married for the second time to men who, (dare I say it?) worship us.

Both of the men, too, seem very alike in personality and interests. They are each of Scotch-Irish descent, a bit reserved at first, but warm up and are very friendly. Each of them hates crowds and large groups. Both are avid readers of the same types of books, and watchers of the same tv programs. They are both outdoor guys...never wanting to be in a stuffy house. Both are sky watchers and weather predictors. Trees and plants, flora and fauna...nature boys! It all seems to be going so easily.

So easily, in fact, that we've adjusted our schedule so that we will visit East Hampton at the same time as the trip Aine and Bruce have scheduled. We will share the exploration of the cemetaries, digging up the old bones of our family (not literally, of course.) We'll follow the footsteps our Lopers left for us...walking the same paths they walked. We'll visit the sad-looking old Life Saving Station in Amagansett, and the sites where others stood (if we can figure out where!) I'll give Aine and Bruce a guided tour of the area, and point out the Loper homes which still stand, or at least, the property where they were. We'll try to meet with other Loper family members, some of which I know, some I don't, though we lived in the same town for decades. It's time I met them!

All Mike and I have done since this began is to talk about Aine and Bruce....and I'm told the same going on in an old house in Maine, only with our names as the subject of conversation! The brain matter is brimming with information, and the faces are grinning with anticipation....even the men's! We've decided to share a cottage, and although people may think it's crazy because we've never met, we may actually know more about each other than most of the people we've known all our lives!

This computer, once feared, once hated, has become my best friend, for it's introduced me to many new people and reconnected me to many old friends. What a wonderful invention!
Stay tuned for more of these stories! I believe that this is just the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

The Continuing Saga....

Unexpected family, as I wrote yesterday. Little did I know! Aine and I have been wearing out the keyboard on our computers, and our heads are spinning with information shared and to be shared. Not only on the Loper families, but...with the discovery of an O'Sullivan name in her photographs, we began to speak on that surname.

The wind was knocked out of us both, as she hunted through her notes. With a tiny smidgeon of information I'd given her on my former, late, father in law, she shot back an email with much information on him. Some was new to me, but the rest was true! Her great-grandmother was an O'Sullivan from my Patrick's location in Ireland, and she had a much younger brother in her 14 siblings, named Patrick. Parental names for both her and my subject are the same. Both her Patrick and mine arrived in the US in the same year. Can it be that they are one in the same family?! We now have a contact at work in Ireland on this.

I feel as if we've tumbled into the twilight zone! If this mystery unravels and connects my children to her on another level, I will be doubly blessed, in the meeting of Aine, as I've had so little to offer my kids on their paternal side. But God has granted me yet another blessing in life the meeting of Aine, whether or not Aine's O'Sullivan bunch lines up with ours.

If it does, I will also begin to believe the old adage...."It is a small world." Indeed!

Unexpected Family

For a good many years, I've been exploring my ancestral lines. A few months ago, I bought a 3month subscription to Ancestry.com, hoping to find some hidden bits that have thus far eluded me. I got more than I'd bargained for!

On that site, you can enter your own information, and the website will automatically give you hints on others who are searching the same family names. At times, you discover that there's no connection, but at other times you will get lucky and connect with someone who is searching and entering information on the same family line as yours. Such is the case with me. I've been corresponding for a few days, non-stop, with a woman who is, like me, a 12th generation member of the Loper family. Our line converges at the seventh generation, making us distant cousins.

What a delight she is! She's warm, friendly and willing to share all she knows about the family. I've been doing the same. Aine (pronounced Ahn-ya) and I have shared our other interests, both of us endulge in crafts, writing, gardening. We've compared notes about our husbands and their likes and their ancestries. These men are, as Aine says, 'cut from the same tartan cloth'. We look forward to a day when we will meet. In fact, they are going to East Hampton to look further into her predecessors lives, to see their stomping grounds. We have a trip planned for later than their visit, but all four of us are thinking how wonderful it would be for us all to be there together. In fact, they've even offered to share the rental which I helped set up for them there!

I don't know if our schedule will be worked out so that we can go during the time of their visit, but I believe we will meet face to face sometime, somewhere. Whether or not that comes to fruition, I've no doubt that we will continue with our email correspondence and develop this fabulous friendship we've begun.

Life brings its sorrows, no doubt, but oh...when it brings such joyous surprises, all else pales! I look forward to seeing how this all plays out.

Thoughts on Weather

When I woke this morning, with the ceiling fan and AC on, I thought, "it's hot!" No wonder...the local weather says we're heading into triple digit heat index, with temps of high 90's today. Oh, good. Another quiet day inside, doing our best to stay cool with the aid of mechanical helpers.

I signed on to Facebook, to discover that there were some heavy thunderstorms, and a possible tornado, in my old neighborhood. It appears, from the posted photos, that trees were down all over the area and I heard that some boats were over-turned and sunk. I'm not a huge fan of rocking, rolling weather. The idea of tornados scares me silly.

Living in the south, I've gotten used to tornado watches and warnings on tv. I've finally learned where they are on the map, in relation to where we reside. That's helped to relieve some of the fear I had when I first moved here. We rarely hear of a touch down close by, but have seen evidence of some pretty rough storms.

Unless it's completely impossible, when a thunderstorm is brewing, my husband spends hours on the front porch watching the skies. As the thunderheads build and billow off in the distant gray, he seems mesmarized. When the thunder rolls across the heavens, it's like music to him, and when the shows of lightening streak, he can be heard saying, "whoa!" with great excitment in his voice. As long as the viewing is from a very distant vantage point, I will sometimes sit with him. But if the rain is here, falling sideways from a dark and noisey sky overhead, you will definitely find me inside the house, talking myself out of the trepidation that fills my innards.

I happen to be happiest in temperatures that are evident in Spring and Fall, but because of the changes in temps, those seasons bring our fiercest storms. If there's anything I've learned about the weather, it's to be prepared for anything. Unlike much of life, there's not a single thing I can do to change any of it, so I just accept it and try to do something, instead, about the way I feel about it.

I've applied that theory to most things in life. Even though storms and fearful circumstances come , I know they they will pass sooner or later. I have to ride them out 'til they do, even if I hide my head in my pillow or scream out after each thunderous rumble. In the end, the calm does come.

It's always such a fun time when my grandchildren come to visit. This Summer, Kimberly and Rebecca have come, but just for a week and with their Mom. It's wonderful having them all, and different from when the girls come alone for longer time. I'm not complaining, mind you! Any time at all with my kids and theirs is special for us, and we try to cater to them so that they feel the same way.

This time, Amy planned to leave the girls here while she would go to Georgia for a few days to see some friends, but as it turned out, Kimberly decided to go with her Mom. Becca stayed behind. We had some routine chores to do yesterday, and Becca jumped right in to help fold clothes and pick up the guest room. She's a great little worker! When we were finished, Papa, Becca and I loaded the van and went over to the fishing spot so Becca could try her hand at catching a trout or a catfish.

It was a beautiful, but warm, day. We chose a spot on the stocked pond where Becca could cast and reel in her line without interfering with other fishing folk. Papa and I set up some folding chairs in the shade, and Becca picked a spot to stand. She wasn't ready to bait the hook, especially with the suggested bait...leeches. (I don't blame her!) Our hero...Papa....did the deed with those slimy black things, and Becca walked off to her special place to begin an earnest effort to catch her fish. We know there were fish in the pond, because we watched two men, over the course of the afternoon, catch one each.

She cast, she trolled, she reeled in, and cast the line again. She didn't have the patience to let the bobber lie still in the water, waiting for the fish 0to come to it. I think she just enjoyed the casting. (Lord knows she'd had plenty of practice, having drawn targets and whales on the cul de sac with sidewalk chalks, and casting the line out to those during the past few days.)

After a few hours, and a number of great pictures of "HuckleBecca Finn" in her straw hat, we decided it was time to head home for dinner. A disappointed ten year old didn't want to leave, but was very good about it. Even though her fish bucket was empty, she apparently had a good time, as she asked if we could do it again before she goes back to NY.

The interest in fishing has never lured me or for Mike, but the being together in the activity with a child is another story altogether. Fish or no fish, we had a 'whale' of a time, and made happy memories together. That's all that counts in the end.