Monday, May 4, 2009

Never say "Never"

My mom always says, "Never say 'never' ", and by this time, you would think I would have learned to listen. Somehow it seems that the wisdom in that little phrase has escaped me.

Thinking back, I can remember a number of specific times when I said "I'll never..." followed by some act or idea I deemed impossible for me to ever even think of doing. As a rebellious child, I said, "I'll never tell my kids 'because I said so, that's why.' " "I'll never leave East Hampton" I said once. "I'll never own a computer. They put people out of work" I declared in my ignorance.
"I'll never move to the South. EVER! I don't even want to visit ." "I'll never get to retire."

Guess what? I did say 'because I said so'. It just came tumbling out of my mouth one day while in the middle of one of those 'why/why not' sessions that kids always want to have when parents are at their most weary. I guess they think we're in a weakend condition, and if they strike then, we'll give in. I didn't, but the dreaded words were said.

I did leave my beloved home-town, too. When it became unbearable for us to stay, and after years of deliberation, we packed up and moved away, saying we'd never go back. (there's that word again!) And...guess where we ended up? Oddly enough, we're in the South. We're also retired! Ironically, we probably would not have been able to retire had we stayed in East Hampton, so much good has come of a few occurances I'd never dreamed of.

Not only did I get a computer, I am now using the fourth one I've owned. I believe they've opened up an entire world to me, and to other users of them, and I can't imagine why anyone would not want to use one. As for my silly statement about them taking jobs from people, I recant. In fact, I'm sure that many people have jobs because of the popularity of computers.

Now, I hope I have learned to listen to my mother, after all this. I hope I'll never say 'never' again, but I wouldn't count on it. I'm never good at keeping resolutions.

A Career for Me?

When I grow up I think I'll be a crime scene investigator. Well, maybe not out on the street doing the photographing and marking of evidence, but one who thinks about all the clues and parts of the crime, and puts them together to solve the case. I'm getting pretty good at it, after watching CSI, NCIS, True Detectives, and the many other dramatizations, as well as true life, TV shows.

Of course, I think it's probably easier for me to solve these cases from my couch than it would be if I was working in the field. After all, I'm seeing the entire case unfold before my eyes in one hour, when everything is fresh in my mind, rather than plowing through mountains of photographs and reports and testimonies over months of time.

Seriously, though, I like mysteries and trying to solve them. I'm not big on blood and gore and violence, but it goes with the territory, I suppose. I like investigation. My favorite books and movies revolve around mystery, and the more twists and turns they take, the better I like it.

I wouldn't mind sitting on a jury, but I'd want to be sure that the investigators had the proper facts, as I'd never want to cause someone to be punished unjustly.

Maybe, instead, I should look into medical investigation. I like to put the symptoms together and figure out what's causing them. Years ago when I worked for a chiropractor, he showed me xrays of patients and explained what I was looking at. That fascinated me, and it still does. I am never thrilled to have that sort of test, but when I must, I try to watch the screens of the ultrasound or the echo cardiograms to see what the technician sees. I'm awestruck to know that we can see inside the body without surgical procedures.

I might be a little old to be going to school today to pursue any sort of career, at this point. The options are open to me, however, and all I've got to do is make up my mind as to which one I'll focus on. For now, I think it'll be the tv screen.